The #DivasThatCare movement is a dynamic force of positivity and progress. It's a collective of empowered women united by a shared vision: to pave the way for future generations. These women are not only breaking barriers—they’re also committed to equipping the next generation with the tools, resources, and confidence to lead with purpose.
By discovering and defining your purpose, you unlock the power to uplift those around you and contribute to a better world—every single day.
The Divas That Care Change Makers lead by example. They’ve walked the path, and now they’re using their voices to inspire others—one intentional day at a time.
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Come and listen to our Host, Tina Spoletini, as she chats with inspiring guest Robin Sims-Allen for our “Speak Up & Stand Firm” Podcast Mini-Series.
This powerful series is all about finding your voice, trusting your truth, and having the courage to stand firm in what matters most. We’ll explore what it means to speak with confidence, create healthy boundaries, advocate for yourself and others, and stop allowing fear, guilt, or the opinions of others to silence you.
Through honest conversations, real-life stories, and practical wisdom, we’ll encourage DIVAS to step into their power—not by being the loudest person in the room, but by being confident enough to know that their voice matters.
Whether you’re learning to say “no,” having a difficult conversation, standing up for yourself, or finally speaking the truth you’ve been holding inside, this series will remind you that your voice has value, your boundaries deserve respect, and your story deserves to be heard.
Robin Sims-Allen is a powerhouse entrepreneur, transformative leader, wife, and mother of two dynamic teens. With more than two decades in technology and business leadership, she thrives at the intersection of innovation, strategy, and impact.
A serial entrepreneur, Robin leads with precision and purpose, helping organizations optimize operations, eliminate bottlenecks, and deliver meaningful products to market with agility and efficiency. She serves as the visionary founder of Phoenix Marcus, a dynamic enterprise with multiple divisions tailored to the demands of the digital era.
Within Phoenix Marcus, she launched Phoenix Marcus Online, where she is a recognized expert in agile consulting and bottleneck analysis for Fintech and tech-driven companies. Her strategic insights ensure businesses don’t just solve problems — they thrive by protecting their greatest assets: people, culture, and innovation.
Robin is also the creator and driving force behind TotalHER, a purpose-built social platform designed to elevate women everywhere. With TotalHER, her mission is clear: build a sisterhood and economy that supports every woman — whether she’s scaling her career, leading with confidence, or embracing her unique journey. Built as a safe, empowering space, TotalHER fosters authentic connection, collaboration, and opportunity for women globally.
Her entrepreneurial journey includes launching her first startup, AskGeeser, a teen-focused social network dedicated to helping young leaders amplify their voices and build real skills. Though ahead of its time, the experience shaped Robin’s future approach — one rooted in resilience, timing, and strategic growth.
Driven by authenticity, courage, and vision, Robin doesn’t just lead companies — she builds ecosystems where people are empowered to flourish. She shows up honestly, shares her lessons learned, and paves the way forward with infectious ambition.
• realising you have something to say early on but growing into the confidence to say it out loud • navigating seasons where being knowledgeable feels like a liability while you grow a business • building safe spaces for women through honest conversations about fulfilment, career and money • setting boundaries by naming non negotiables and refusing to over give when energy is not matched • using a pros and cons list to fact check reciprocity and make decisions with clarity • fact checking feelings and avoiding hard talks when emotions are running hot • why fear of judgement keeps women from speaking up or asking for support • learning the difference between venting and fixing and choosing the right audience • small communication practices that help you feel heard without posting online • how Total Her supports community, sisterhood and a future of work network for women
For more Divas That Care Network Episodes visit www.divasthatcare.com
It's Divas that Care Radio. Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change. Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone. This is a global movement for women, by women engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations. To find out more about the movement, visit divasletcare.com after the show. Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration.
SPEAKER_02
Welcome to Confidence in Bloom, where we explore the moments that shape our confidence and remind us that we were never meant to stay hidden. This season is all about speaking up and standing firm, using our voices with courage, setting healthy boundaries, and learning to advocate for ourselves with confidence and grace. Today's guest is someone who has built businesses, led teams, embraced innovation, and created spaces where women can rise together. Robin Sims Allen is a serial entrepreneur, technology leader, founder of Phoenix Marcus, and the visionary behind Total Her, a platform created to connect, empower, and elevate women around the world. But behind every successful entrepreneur is a story of courage, setbacks, learning, and finding the confidence to keep showing up. Robin, welcome to Confidence in Bloom. I'm so excited to have this conversation with you. Me too. Awesome, awesome. Now let's get started.
When you think back over your life, can you remember a specific moment when you realize that your voice actually mattered? You know, maybe a time when you spoke up or wish you had and it had changed something in you?
SPEAKER_00
Well, let's see. So there would be different times. Um, there would be times where I knew I needed to speak up and felt like my voice needed to be heard, but I didn't have the confidence to do so. So the time that I knew that I needed to speak up was probably about 10, somewhere in between the ages of 10 and 12. Um, when did I become confident enough to speak out? Um, I would probably say that happened around age 23, 24.
SPEAKER_02
Wow. Okay, so there's quite, I mean, you're luckily at 23, 24, you were you felt strong, right? That you could do that. At 10, 11, you know, you're still learning, you're learning your your kind of your grounding in life, right? And that's really a sensitive time in our lives where you want to say something, but you know, like in your case, you probably just felt like, I don't know. I think I'll just get, you know, we used to say a backhand. We never got the backhand, but it was sort of the the look, right? We used to get the look like now's not the time.
SPEAKER_00
Well, see, and that's the thing. Um, when I was about that age, I was giving adults um life coaching um advice, literally at that age, um, which is why um my nickname back then was geezer, because I was literally an person that was young, but I was wise. Um, and it probably came from the fact that um I didn't really read like children-related um things. I was reading like Danielle Still, James Patterson. I was reading stuff like that when I was like seven and eight years old. So I didn't even I think the most kiddie thing that I read was probably the babysitters club, but other than that, everything else, I was Nora Roberts, Danielle Still, all of that. So that's why I said I I really knew I had something to say at that age. I just didn't, just confidently, only in closed settings or censored settings, right?
SPEAKER_02
Right. So you were like really like a child living in an adult world. Did you have siblings or were you an only child?
SPEAKER_00
I was an only child for a period of time. I do have a brother, but he is like seven or eight years behind me. So by the time we got in the same household, um, I was older.
SPEAKER_02
Oh, okay, okay. So yeah, you were sort of like he's too young for me. So you were like, you felt like you were part of the adult world.
SPEAKER_00
Yes. And to the to the whole thing, the whole my whole childhood, I maybe spent maybe a year or so um, you know, as a kid with my brother. And then other than that, we didn't really um spend a whole lot of time together until we were both adults.
SPEAKER_02
Wow. Wow. I hope you have a good relationship now. We do, yes. Excellent. I know there's there comes an age where all of a sudden it doesn't really matter, you know, how much older or younger you are than each other. Like you are we're we're all adults now, right? Yeah, yeah. I love that. I
love that. Have there been seasons where you questioned yourself or felt pressure to make yourself smaller in order to fit into the room? And if so, what what helped you stay true to who you are instead of who others expected you to be?
SPEAKER_00
Right now, I'm in that season right now. Um, it's almost kind of like knowing too much um is a problem, um, or being knowledgeable in one particular area is almost frowned upon. So it's it's literally that season that I'm in right at this particular moment, especially at the point of trying to grow my business and I'm looking for investors and different things of that nature. So you almost have to kind of play two different roles. You either have to be the smartest one in the room or the dumbest one, it just depends. Um, so it's definitely that season that I'm dealing with right now. The difference is um, I know the end goal. Um the so it's it's a temporary thing. It's the it's kind of being transactional but transformational and moving forward at the same time and knowing when to be. Oh, I love that.
SPEAKER_02
I love that. And that's you know, we all know that this, you know, we we learn these things through our life, right? Through our own personal experience. Uh, I'm interested to know maybe if you could share a story that taught you how to create like safe spaces for you as well as for the people that you know so that they can be heard and um and how those people sort of become important
That's just in general, women. Um, in general, I've had several conversations with women over the past, I want to say about 12, 13 years. They're either struggling mentally um because they're going through a lot, they're trying to maintain things, they're trying to have families, or they're looking at the destruction of a family. Um, there may be addiction in the family, it may be fertility issues. Um, but what I noticed was it was a lot of conversations about fulfillment and career. Um, so with that, they were either building um their careers or they're trying to exit their career and try to do their own thing or their branching out. It was always something related to um trying to have meaningful, purposeful type of life. And a lot of it um boiled down or trickled down to financial. And when we started unpacking the things that they need, that is why I created the venture total her, because it addressed all of those needs that women were telling me that they were looking for that they were missing in the the market they were currently in.
SPEAKER_02
Right, right. And I would imagine that many of those conversations were around boundaries, right? Because, yeah, like there are boundaries, relationships, right? Like I want this, but I don't want it to damage this, and I want, you know, I want to move forward in my career, but I also want to have a family. Those kinds of conversations I'm sure were were many, right? Um now that brings me to wonder, like what kind of what kind of boundary did you like when you speak with these women, the boundaries that you had to sort of um encourage them to set, you know, some of them would have been super difficult, right? But how would you bring them to sort of allow themselves to set that boundary and then really honor it? How how did you how would you do that?
Simply asking, what are your non-negotiables? And whatever those are, stick to it, don't do anything beyond that. Um, and I'm also a strong advocate of going above and beyond and not having that energy matched. You probably don't need to be doing that. So that that goes for anything. If you're working at a workforce and you're putting 110% in, they're not valuing you, they're not treating you well, then stop doing over the amount. Meet them at the description that you were hired for and leave it there. Don't do an extra step over that. Um, same thing, your marriage or your um relationships with your friends. If that energy is not being matched, don't do over because it's not gonna come back to you in a way that you expected. You're not gonna get that return that you're looking for. Either it's going to drain you or it's going to somehow leave you with the point of where you feel like you're getting less. And it's not really about getting less, it's really about matching what you're receiving, putting out what you expect to get back in. Right, right.
SPEAKER_02
And so, okay, so let's say um, I don't really understand if it's matching, right? Like we've we've had this discussion, and you know, I'm set a boundary, and you've you've given me this advice that you just gave me. How do I know that the energy coming from the other person in this relationship is truly matching me?
If you have a difficult time trying to establish whether or not that um is reciprocal at any point, then my best next advice to you is literally write a list of pros and cons. What are the things that occurred? What are the the things that you found were against your boundary, against your morals, against your ethics, whatever it was, write those things down under the con section. And then the pros, what what exactly were the wins? What were you getting out of that? What was accomplished? What was the action behind that? What was the reward of that particular action? And when you go to compare that list and you have more cons than you do pros, it's not reciprocal. Let it go.
SPEAKER_02
Oh, I see. So it's not necessarily just a feeling, it's more of what you're seeing. Like it could be, I guess it could be a feeling depending on how accepted, right? But you're saying there's more to it than just how you're feeling.
SPEAKER_00
Yes. I mean, always fact-check your feelings because feelings can change from moment to moment. And a lot of times if you are feeling triggered or angry or happy or whatever it is, that next moment after that is going to either validate that particular feeling or you're going to feel in conflict with that particular feeling. So that is why I'm saying write the pros and the cons list because you're going to be able to play those things back and you'll be able to say, okay, well, this was a con for me. This was a pro positive for me, and that's how you would go about it. And then I always say never write these lists when you're feeling emotional, when you're angry or anything like that. Matter of fact, try not to have conversations with people when you are feeling angry and different things of that nature because what you're going to say is probably not really your true feelings, but they could be taken out of context, and then now you have to apologize for it after the fact. So it's just best to approach the situation diplomatically.
SPEAKER_02
Right. And that totally makes sense, right? Like I know myself when I'm feeling emotional, whether it's angry, happy, or sad or whatever it is, I look at the world in general differently, right? And then if I can walk into a room with like a kind of like um know nothing kind of state, I can see the I can see what's happening in a more neutral eye.
SPEAKER_00
Yes. And you want to enter a room just like that because if you were feeling one way or emotional or this way or not, um, you could be not having the right conversations. You might need some particular information or something to uh to happen in that room. And if you have come in with some type of biased uh reaction or feeling, then you're not gonna get it. You're not gonna get what you're what you're seeking um at the end of it. So you want to always enter a room with just being unknown, you know, feeling the unknown. You don't know what's gonna happen. This could be a positive experience or it could be a negative, but don't go in there thinking one way or another, because then everything is gonna lead
You're gonna exactly you're gonna continue to go that way. And if you don't and you end up going on the other side, it's it's gonna be biased in some way or another. Yeah, I love I like that. I like that answer. Um, what do you think keeps women um from speaking up or asking for support?
SPEAKER_00
Probably concerned with what people think about them. Um, and that's a good thing, but it's also a bad thing. Um, I think everyone should be cognizant of what other people think about them, but at the same time, it shouldn't determine your actions. Um, you should be whoever you are authentically, um, regardless of whether or not, I mean, you're not gonna be everybody's cup of tea anyway. So just don't even have the expectation of meeting everyone's expectation. Right.
SPEAKER_02
Yeah.
SPEAKER_00
So it's it's just as simple as that. You're just be who you are, right? Exactly who you are.
SPEAKER_02
Exactly. I love that. And so when you uh in your experience, what do you think happens to a woman or what have you seen happens to a woman when when she realizes that she doesn't have to do everything all alone?
SPEAKER_00
A couple of things happen. Um, either she came to that conclusion by way of voluntarily, or she came to that conclusion involuntarily, which means something imploded and something made her go into that particular uh framework, and it was a reaction or a response to something. So it's it's literally something that women just have to balance the scales with that, because you're either going to um experience something that's gonna lead you one way, or it's gonna experience something to lead you the opposite way. The only thing that I would be cognizant of is understanding that both are gonna occur regardless.
SPEAKER_02
Right, right, regardless, exactly. I know that there's been times where I feel like I'm I'm in this alone, right? I feel like I have to be the only one in this entire world going through this. And then I sit around a table with other women and they tell me, oh my God, yeah, I've been going through that myself, right? And I know in my own body, I can literally feel the weight sort of dissipate, right? My shoulders feel more relaxed, my back tends to like, I just sort of sit back in my chair and I'm like, oh my goodness, I'm not alone, right? And so you have to share, exactly.
SPEAKER_00
Share what you're experiencing, share what you're feeling, because I guarantee you you are not going through it by yourself. There is there's not one situation on earth that someone else hasn't gone through, right?
SPEAKER_02
Literally, and it may not be exactly the same, like it might be, you know, it might be through with your kids, it might be with your husband, it might be with a coworker, it might be you alone, because I mean we have lots of you know, like hormone changes, like it could be like an internal thing, exactly, you know, but someone is feeling that same shift of some sort, right? And it's okay to share and reach out, right? And know that there is someone that can hold your hand through it, right? There's gonna be those people that, you know, uh, you're on that, you're all on your own for with this because they don't know it's more about them not knowing how to handle it than it is about not knowing how to help you, they just don't know how to do that, right?
need that, you don't need someone to actually walk you through a process, you just need someone to be of support. Um, there has been times where I couldn't communicate my feelings to my friends, and we would just sit there in silence. Nobody says nothing, and sometimes that's enough.
SPEAKER_02
That's enough, yes, yes, yes. I I understand that. I only understand that because I've been through that, right? All I need is for you to hear me. That's it. I just want to say what's on my mind. I don't need you to say anything about it or to me or anything, just hear me, right? I've been experienced that myself, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00
Sometimes you have that issue. Um, I hear all the time with women, um, they have issues communicating with their husbands, um, primarily because men are programmed to solve, they they fix that's what they do. Um, and a lot of times when women are trying to communicate with their husbands, it's not for them to fix. We just want you to listen. Yeah, just hear me out. Yeah, so that's so it just becomes the you gotta know your audience and and who you're so if you're gonna have a conversation with you with your husband and you know he's a fixer, probably just take the problem to him. Don't take the the venting part because he's not gonna understand.
SPEAKER_02
Right, right. And women, I noticed. So I have two boys and a girl, and I notice that when the boys have issues, they come to me with the issue alone. Whereas my daughter, she will bring the issue, but the issue is always at the end of the conversation. She gives me all the details of what is the issue, right? And so, you know, I so I mean, as a coach, I get it. I, you know, I sort of let her do the talking. And with the boys, we get straight to the point because that's what they want. They want the solution and they want it right now. They don't need to pussyfoot around, you know, the context, like you said, right? Whereas I find most women, they want to give the story, they want to tell you more about the story than well, with my boys. I'm not saying they're all the same because I know that you know mine, my son is the same way.
SPEAKER_00
He literally he brings the problem, he wants the solution. And I'm like, well, tell me how you were feeling during the process. I mean, is that is that important? I mean, I mean, what do I do? Well, how did you arrive at this? It's so it's literally that you're probing, right? But a lot of you know, people in general, they literally
just want to hear the solution, they don't want to talk through what happened because they probably have already talked through what happened internally, and they just don't want to rehash that. Exactly. Because they may have thought what they were thinking was irrational in the first place, and they definitely don't want to see the judgment um across someone's face when they do uh recap that exactly, exactly.
SPEAKER_02
Yeah, I think yeah, that has it really it has a lot to do with that, and and you know, I know as a coach, we're not here to judge you, right? We're we're just here to help you and listen to you, and you know, I mean, our faces might show something you don't want to, but it's not, it's not real, right? Like it's not, you know, we might be, you know, expressive in our in our you know, physic body language, but that you know, that doesn't mean we're taking it on as personal. Now, tell me, Robin, if a woman who's listening today feels invisible or unheard or maybe afraid to use her voice because she's worried about that judgment, what would you want her to know? And what's one small step that she could take this week to begin to start standing firmly and Who she really is.
SPEAKER_00
Communicate. And when I mean communicate, communicate in a way that makes sense to you. So if you are the type of person who is visual or expressive in that moment, take a video of yourself literally talking about what it is that is on your heart or burdening you and just talk it out. You don't have to send it to anybody. It doesn't need to go up on YouTube or whatever. It's just something you can simply play back. Or if you're a text person, I'm the type of person I am a texter. So I will text out something and leave it in draft indefinitely. Um, and and and that's what I do. Um, I do the same thing in emails. I have like maybe a hundred emails that I've never sent. I just needed to get my thoughts out and leave it somewhere and leave it there. Um, journaling works if you're a journaler. Me, I try not to do the journaler because it it drives me, it gives me the the feeling that I need to go back
and recheck it. So that bothers me. So I can't do that. But other women can do that definitely. Or find you someone that you're comfortable with talking to. And whether that be someone that is a friend, um, or in my case, I enjoy talking to strangers. And the reason I like talking to strangers is because you don't have to worry that they've already prejudged you. They don't know you enough to have already come up with something, they don't know you enough to do anything but listen and give you their perspective, and they're going from there. Um, so that could be anyone, a neighbor, that could be a person that you don't talk to on a regular basis, it could be an actual therapist or a coach. Um, utilize those resources. Um, you can even if for if you really want some random advice, put it in Reddit. I mean, literally, post it on Reddit, and about a million people are gonna respond. So you can do that. Um, so there's a lot of ways you can blog if if that's what you want to do. But what I will recommend is whatever you do, do not post your feelings about a situation on any public platform like Instagram, Facebook, X, none of those stuff because that stuff is gonna come back and haunt you later.
SPEAKER_02
Isn't that the truth, right? Like we we all we've all been there where you make a comment or you make a post and you get the attention that you were not looking for, right? We've all been there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's really good advice. Write it out if you need to put it on paper, write it out. Whether it is in a journal or it's in an email or like you said, a text message that you never send, do it. Make yourself like release that, release that pressure, release those feelings, whatever way works for you. And if not, reach out to a coach, you know, reach out to Robin, reach out to myself, like we can help you, right? That's what we want to do, right? We want to help women get through whatever whatever tornadoes they're dealing with. Exactly. Yeah, absolutely. Is there anything else you would like our listeners to hear today?
SPEAKER_00
Um, no, just uh women total her is out there. So if you are building a brand, scaling a brand, or if you want to know about scaling a brand, version one is already out in the app store as well as Google Play. Version two is coming out soon, and version two is a thousand times better than version one, and you're gonna really enjoy it. Awesome.
SPEAKER_02
I love that. I love that. Maybe tell us a little bit more about after no, what's it called? Total her. Total her. Total her.
SPEAKER_00
Yeah, tell us a little bit more. So total her right now is a community-based platform dedicated strictly to women, so it's about community, it's about building your sisterhood, reaching out and finding your tribe. Um, and what we're getting ready to transform into, version two that I was mentioning, is where we're literally going to change women's lives because we're going to move from the traditional social um networking platform to a future of
work networking platform. So is getting ready to be an opportunity for women to get their time back in a way that works well for them, which means you'll be able to supplement your income or replace it in its entirety.
SPEAKER_02
Wow, that's that sounds amazing. Well, congratulations on that, because that sounds like a really big, big feat. Yes. Yeah, awesome. Well, thank you so much for sharing all your expertise and your knowledge today, Robin. This has been so awesome. I always loved, you know, when we talk empowering women. I think that that's like that's my thing, right? I want I want women to feel like, first of all, that they're not alone and that whatever they put their mind to, they can do, right? Sometimes they need a little bit of a push from, you know, another female or another, you know, coworker or friend or coach, whatever it is. And I love that we can share our words here and allow the women to learn that. So thank you so much for joining me today and for you know, sharing everything that you've had with us. Definitely. It was fun. Awesome. I hope today's conversation encourages you to stand a little taller, speak a little more boldly, and remember that your voice deserves to be heard. If something in today's episode resonated with you and you're feeling ready to move forward beyond self-doubt, overwhelm, or second guessing yourself, I'd love to support you. My work is all about helping women reconnect with themselves, trust their inner wisdom, and move forward with clarity and confidence. One meaningful step at a time. Until next time, keep blooming into the woman you were always meant to become.
SPEAKER_01
Thanks for listening. This show was brought to you by Divas That Care. Connect with us on Facebook, on Instagram, and of course on divas that care.com, where you can subscribe to our newsletter so you don't miss a thing.
