Divas That Care Network

Reset, Refuel, Reclaim Midlife Energy

• Divas That Care Network • Season 15 • Episode 55

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Come and listen to our Host, Tina Spoletini, as she chats with today's guest, Karen Porter, for our “End of Year, Beginning of Me” Podcast Series.
A powerfully themed mini-series helping women close the year with clarity and step into the next one with grounded self-love and vision.

For almost 30 years Karen battled severe IBS, anxiety and debilitating bouts of suicidal

depression that left her hospitalized and grasping for her life. Forced to re-evaluate everything

and take her health into her own hands, she started looking into alternative methods to help her heal where the traditional medical approach had failed. She learned the tools to transform her life, to feel healthy, happy, focused, and radiant! Her health, and consequently her life, shifted entirely, and she felt compelled to help as many women as possible to feel their absolute best! Especially moving into menopause and beyond.

At almost 60 herself, Karen is passionate about helping women over 50 regain their energy and feel great in their bodies, so they can live their best life! As a Women’s Health & Wellness Coach she takes the confusion and overwhelm out of mindset,managing stress, meals, movement & happiness with a proven program – Your Best Life Reset – which guarantees weight loss, reduced inflammation, more energy, better sleep, better mental focus, hormone balancing and increased confidence! She helps you to make the rest of your life, the BEST of your life! Karen has been featured on stages, podcasts, as well as on CP24, Global TV and Breakfast Television.

For almost 30 years, Karen battled severe IBS, anxiety, and suicidal depression that left her hospitalized and desperate for answers. When traditional medicine failed her, she turned to alternative healing methods that completely transformed her health and happiness. Now, approaching 60, Karen is passionate about helping women over 50 regain their energy, balance their hormones, and feel vibrant through her proven Your Best Life Reset program. She’s been featured on stages, podcasts, and major media outlets like CP24, Global TV, and Breakfast Television—empowering women to make the rest of their life the best of their life.

https://karenporter.ca/

We explore how gut health, breathwork, and mindset helped Karen Porter move from decades of IBS and depression to an empowered, vibrant midlife grounded in simple, sustainable habits. Practical resets, the five M’s framework, and a supportive community offer clear steps to feel better now.

• Elimination diet fundamentals and inflammatory trigger foods
• Gut-brain axis links to anxiety, sleep, and mood
• Menopause as a liberating reset, not a life sentence
• Lifestyle foundations before considering HRT
• The five M’s: mindset, nervous system, meals, movement, joy
• Breathwork basics, nasal breathing, and longer exhales
• Hydration, electrolytes, and cutting late-night snacking
• Clarifying your why and building resilient routines
• Your Best Life Reset program structure and support
• Free resources, challenges, and how to connect with Karen

For more Divas That Care Network Episodes visit www.divasthatcare.com

SPEAKER_00:

It's Divas That Care Radio. Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change. Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone. This is a global movement for women, by women engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations. To find out more about the movement, visit divas that care.com after the show. Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration.

SPEAKER_01:

Welcome to Confidence in Bloom, the podcast that reminds you that confidence isn't about becoming someone new, it's about becoming home to yourself. I'm your host, Tina Spolotini, and this season we're embracing the theme End of Year, Beginning of Me, a time to pause, reflect, and let go of what no longer serves you. Together we'll explore real stories and soulful insights to help you quiet that itty bitty shitty committee, release the shoulds that weigh you down, and step into the new year grounded in self-love, clarity, and confidence. Let's begin today's conversation. Today's I'm chatting with Karen Porter. For almost 30 years, Karen battled severe IBS, anxiety, and suicidal depression that left her hospitalized and desperate for answers. When traditional medicine failed her, she turned to alternative healing methods that completely transformed her health and happiness. Now approaching 60, Karen is passionate about helping women over 50 regain their energy, balance their hormones, and feel vibrant through her proven your best life reset program. She's been featured on stages, podcasts, and major media outlets like CP24, Global TV, and Breakfast Television, empowering women to make the rest of their life the best of their life.

SPEAKER_02:

Welcome, Karen. Hello, thanks for having me.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, absolutely. I'm really looking forward to our discussions because you know, menopause is sort of one of the top of the list, right? With most women that I chat with. And I want, I mean, you've come from some pretty incredibly dark chapters in your life. You know, with depression and IBS. I mean, we those two issues are they're common. They seem to be very common in the world today. Um, what I'm interested in is, you know, how you pulled yourself out of that. Like what created the beginning of me shift in you?

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Well, it was the the IBS is really something that I had uh from my 20s to my late 40s, and actually uh really the bouts of uh debilitating anxiety and suicidal depression as well. It was like, okay, it happened once in my 20s and then twice in my 30s and then twice in my 40s, and um and it it was just really, really bad to the point where I was hospitalized and in a psychiatric ward. Um, but what really got me out of it were, you know, were several things, but um, you know, and each time was a little bit different. But what really had the most impact on my life was really um when I met a nutritionist at a cooking class, and um I thought, oh, I need to talk to her more. And she helped me sort of change the way I was looking at food and the way that I was eating. Um, and then you know, that helped helped my gut, which then also affected my brain because of the gut brain access, right? So that, you know, that started to help my mental health, but then it was um, you know, other things as well. Um, you know, I talk about how important mindset is and regulating our nervous system. So that is something I work on every day to be more resilient and and manage my stress, right? Uh so yeah, it was meditation, it is breath work. So it, you know, it's a it's a bunch of tools which I now share with my clients.

SPEAKER_01:

So I mean, I love that because it's never just one thing. Right. And we all know, I mean, we've been hearing it for years now, that our gut health is what creates our life, right? If our gut is not happy, our brain isn't happy, the rest of our body is not happy, our emotions are not I mean, it's you know, we all have to get so I'm you know, I'm curious um what the nutritionist found or what you found when you talked with her. I'm assuming it was a woman, but I think that's what you said, yeah. Um that you know, getting like eating different, right? What did you eat like before? Were you eating like fast food, McDonald's, you know, kind of on the run all the time, or were you eating at home?

SPEAKER_02:

Um a little bit of both. You know, I we yeah, we were we were busy with young kids, and you know, you work with what you have, you do the best that you can with the information that you have, right? I mean, I look back at it now and think, oh my gosh, but I didn't, you know, I didn't really know differently. We all know that apples are better than potato chips, but you know, all of the the choices we make throughout the day really affect us. So the the biggest thing I did with her is really started with an elimination diet. So I really took those those things that had the potential to be bothering me out of my diet. And after a month of that, I said, oh my gosh, like I just feel so much better. And um, so you know, that is really, you know, some of the big things are gluten and dairy and refined sugar, right? Um, and then it's thinking about eating nutrient-dense foods, so whole, you know, whole foods like vegetables and fruit and meat in, well, obviously we're cooking the meat and you can cook the the vegetables, but you know, in their whole form. Um, and unfortunately, uh, we because we're busy, we tend to go for these convenience things, but even things that are healthy, like if they're prepared elsewhere, when you're actually looking at the ingredients, it's it's not what would be truly anti-inflammatory. So an elimination diet is really the same as an anti-inflammatory diet, it's removing those things. And you might think, oh gosh, I couldn't give up bread and sugar, and but you you know, with help, you actually can modify things, and then your taste buds change when you when what you're doing starts to change the microbes in your gut, right? Yeah, so many people think like so. For me, um IBS or irritable irritable bowel syndrome was how it expressed or showed up in my body, right? But you don't have to have you know constant bloating, diarrhea, or constipation for your gut to be affecting other areas, right? So, what I'm saying is you might think you don't have gut issues, but you could, and it can affect your mental health, it can affect your hormones, it can affect uh so many different things, right? So your your experience through perimenopause and into menopause and beyond can be so different if you uh if you know the right tools, if you know how to make the changes or work with somebody that does.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah. And the thing with IBS, and you know this, you know, probably better than I do, they there's no real cause of it. And when you go to the doctor, they don't really know a whole lot about it, which is probably why in your history the medical doctor couldn't help you, the Western medical doctor, right? Because they don't there's no test to say this is what the problem is, right? Right. They just know that your stomach is not working, or not your stomach, but your guts are not working properly with the rest of your body.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. So they can do testing and rule out prones and colitis, but then you're left with this catch-all IBS, right? And you're right. Uh, because I remember asking my doctor about food testing, and he said, no, because it's food and stress. Well, yeah, but we can start making changes with the you know, with the food part, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, you know, but I think, and I mean, you've gone through it. I think the best way is through elimination, right? Testing, yeah, testing might be able to tell you, yeah, you have a little bit of an intolerance to this, but it's probably not that big a deal, or you have an allergy, I mean, allergies, it would be nice, right? It would be nice to watch, you know. But the reality is it's how your body is dealing with life in general, whether it's stress or you know, whatever it is, and then it's like your gut is telling your body how to to like disperse all this stuff, right? And if it's not given the right nutrients, it's gonna make it sick, right? That's basically what it comes down to.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And yeah, the doctor would give me different medications to try and help with this, you know, the the spasms or whatever, whatever it was. But yeah, that doesn't fix anything. That it's just a band-aid. Uh yeah, exactly. Unfortunately, with so many of our pharmaceuticals, they're just uh a band-aid, they are just masking or or not even trying to mask, you know, the symptoms and causing something else, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Exactly. So I'm curious to know what you what you feel. Um so lots of women, I mean, I know women my age that I chat with, as we reach into our 50s, we are exhausted. I mean, we've run, we've raised a family, we've you know, had a career, we've done, we've done life, and now we're at an age where we're heading into the menopause stage and we're exhausted, right? We're disconnected, we're I mean, disconnected from our bodies, let alone from you know, like the rest of life. Right. How does this time of life become like powerful? Like how can we look at this and you know, sort of be empowered and look at it as a new beginning?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, you can uh I mean, it definitely can be empowering and um and a new beginning. Uh, you know, I I responded to something, a post recently, and it said, what is your uh experience or how do you feel about menopause? And I saw that lots of people put comments like hell and awful, and you know, and I put liberating, and there was a few other positive comments like mine. Um, but I'm sure some people, you know, that are going through the hell are just like, oh, you know, that's great that your experience is like that. But um, you know, I make the choices every day from my knowledge, right? Because this is what I've studied and researched, and this is what I'm immersed in, right? Um, so I'm I make the choices daily to help me to feel good and feel empowered, right? So for generally for women, it's you know, working with somebody or trying to get that uh the information, right? It's it's not about you know, you still hear calories in, calories out, or you know, it's obviously it's not that at all. Um, and you know, we don't always want to be measuring things either, right? Um I I try to I teach my uh clients the principles, and then you know, then they know how to, you know, to do it for the rest of their of their lives, right? So it's by you know working with somebody, somebody getting the uh getting the knowledge um and having the plan to move forward. So food is a big part of it, but there's so many other things that we need to pull in, right? Like I say, you can eat all the great stuff and exercise all you want, but if you're stressed, you know, like every day running the treadmill, looking after everybody else, you're still not gonna feel great, right? You're you're gonna be exhausted, your adrenals are um overworked, and your adrenals, by the way, are what has to take over when your uh, you know, estrogen and progesterone and testosterone start to change, right? Yeah. So if you're exhausted, it's just gonna get, it's just gonna get worse. But you know, what is common in menopause, like the hot flashes, the exhaustion, the um, you know, the overwhelm that I hear of often. Um, you know, the the mood swings, the weight gain, the, you know, the difference in the body composition, uh, so many different things, can uh, even though they're common, it doesn't it doesn't mean they're normal or that it has to be that way, right? So um I want women not to accept that and and know that there is a different uh a different path moving forward.

SPEAKER_01:

I love that. I love that. Now I I do have a question, and I'm not sure if if you know the answer to this, but menopause symptoms, you know, like the exhaustion, the the brain fog, the you know, all these things, they seem to be very common, like very similar to what everybody is complaining about. Whether it's men like there are women going through the perimenopause stage, or even now I'm hearing lots of men complaining about the same symptoms. How do we deal with that? Like, I mean, yeah, women can look at that as a perimenopause symptom and say, okay, well, let's get my hormones intact, right? I mean, that's basically what you're saying you do with them or help them to do. But men are having the same issues. Where we're like they're not having menopause, like they're not going through perimenopause. I know that they're going through now, men go through their own, you know, menopause stage, right? I know that there's a name for it, but obviously not coming to many. Right.

SPEAKER_02:

And so now until their testosterone is going down.

SPEAKER_01:

And so is it the same, like, I mean, I I know you don't work with men in that sense, but what like are are we blaming menopause? Like, is it an excuse for us women, or is it just a combination of so many things that we just don't know anymore?

SPEAKER_02:

Right. And and I do actually have some men clients. And and yeah, so the uh sometimes they join with their wives, and sometimes they uh they just come to me on their own. Um, and I see the same great results, like they're they're losing inflammation, they're losing weight, they're um feeling so much better, energy-wise, sleeping better, like so many different things. But yeah, they don't have the perimenopause that's you know, that's where hormones are fluctuating and and you know, we're just all over the place, right? They're more of a gradual decline in their testosterone, but they can feel, like you said, exhausted or have brain fog. And but you know, so much of it has to do with the food, the exercise, the the nervous system, and the mindset.

SPEAKER_01:

Now it's all the same, like it's all the same.

SPEAKER_02:

It is, it it really is. Um, and so we want to do everything to support those things, and then sometimes we look um outside of that in terms of supplements or adaptogens uh that we might want to add to either women or men. Um, and then of course there's HRT, but and and women hear about uh you know the hormone replacement, and it can be good for you know for some women, but it's definitely not where we should start, right?

SPEAKER_01:

I'm glad you said that. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

We need to make lifestyle changes, right? Like you can't just do that's the same as a pill for every ill, right? That's the same, you know.

SPEAKER_01:

Everybody wants the magic pill, right? Exactly. I mean, there is no magic pill, right?

SPEAKER_02:

No, yeah, and it's not an excuse for not eating well or moving your body, right? And you know, women think, oh, like my body's working against me, and everything used to be fine until I hit 50 or until I hit menopause or whatever. But it's actually just that, it's that time where the things that you might have been able to get away with, you no longer can. Right.

SPEAKER_01:

It's finally caught up to you, right? That's what I mean. Exactly. When I was a kid, well, it'll catch up to her one day, right? Right. And you are, right? And now, like, you know, some of us, some of us thrive during menopause. Like I've heard women say, you know, it came and went and they didn't know. And I'm like, how is that possible? I couldn't get myself out of bed for three years, right? All I wanted to do was sleep, yeah. Right. And and then I mean, I didn't have a lot of pain, but tired. I mean, I was exhausted, right? I was past exhausted, right? And and I mean, I went to a doctor and she said, Well, this is normal for women your age, and she popped antidepressants at me. Now, at the time I was like, you know, a little naive to it because I didn't take a lot of medication in my life. So I'm like, oh, well, if this is something that's gonna help me, here I go. Well, you know, right years later, I'm like, okay, this is not working.

SPEAKER_02:

Right?

SPEAKER_01:

It didn't help me. Right. And if anything, I think it made the things worse. But I mean, that's that's a whole new conversation. But I mean, had I known of someone like you, Karen, I would have been like, what do I do now? Right, right, exactly. I mean, I did, I played with a lot of the different things over the years, and I mean, the reality is that the medication controlled what was going through my brain. Right. And so, you know, now that I know I tell women that are feeling the way I felt, I don't care how old they are, but as soon as they give me any kind of symptom that they're feeling like I felt, I'm like, do not tell the doctor you want antidepressants. And if they suggest it, don't take it because you need to try other things first that are more natural. Like exactly right. Like play with the elimination diet. Figure out what your body no longer likes. Because let's face it, what we could eat when we were in our 20s and 30s, our bodies might not want anymore. Right. And we need to admit that. We need to admit it and embrace it.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. And yeah. And sometimes stabbing in the dark is is difficult. And that's why I suggest working with the coach. Because sometimes um you could have trouble with um vegetables that are healthy, uh, but they're they're under the nightshade category. So that's potatoes, tomatoes, eggplant, and bell peppers. But you'd never think that, you know, you would need to cut out those things. But it's just another thing when you're working with somebody, they can help to figure that out for you. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

And I would think, like, okay, so not everybody is the same. So what works for one might not work for the other. But you also have an idea of the average, right? Well, some finding women, you know, like some women are not liking potatoes that that's not agreeing with them. Or, you know, like tomatoes, tomatoes are acid-y, like, you know, probably nobody should be eating it because it's burning the inside of our stomach. But you know, I'm not a doctor and I can't say that, right?

SPEAKER_02:

But there are benefits to it.

SPEAKER_01:

Right? But there are, yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah. So I I mean, I love this. I mean, we could talk all day because I know you have lots of knowledge to share with me, but we want to, we I want to just like, you know, get the you know, the the basics and then have listeners reach out to you if they have more questions. Um I now you we mentioned a little bit about mindset and how you know what like the tools that we have and how they work. How do you help women sort of shift their their mindset so that they know how to use the tools that you can teach them?

SPEAKER_02:

Right. And and that's exactly yeah, the mindset is so important. And I talk about the five M's in my with my clients. And the first one is mastering mindset. Well, even though I call it mastering mindset, none of us really master it, but it's something that we need to work on, right? It's so, so important. Um, the next one is managing our nervous system. So that is, you know, managing our stress, right? We can't let that take over. Uh, the next one is meals made with ease, and then movement for optimization, and then the last one is magnifying joy or happiness. So all of those things are key and things that I work on with clients. Um, but yeah, back to your question about mindset. It's funny because I posted today and I posted about a little mindset tweak. And I'm sure you've heard this before, but it's something I remind myself of and I talk about it with my clients, and it's just reframing something. So, you know, uh something like, oh, I have to exercise. No, I get to exercise, right?

SPEAKER_01:

That's me. I know I have to. I do not like it. And I, yeah, uh that's actually my next question for you.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, we just need to help you find something that brings you a movement that brings you joy, and that's the problem. A lot of us are doing things that someone said we should do and we don't love it and we don't want to keep doing it, right? So it's important to find that. Um, but okay, so how it might apply to um food is, and I'm always saying this to my clients, um, when they say, Oh, I can't have that chocolate bar. No, no, no. You want to, even in your own mind, you don't want to say that to yourself. You want to say, I'm choosing not to have that.

SPEAKER_01:

Right. Because I can't, I mean, I'm not allowed, right?

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, I'm not allowed is the worst, right? Like I'm not allowed, or I can't have it, or you know, whether you're saying it in your own mind or you say it to someone else, either way, it's disempowering and demotivating everything. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, so even if you say I'm choosing not to have that right now, because I'm working with Karen and I'm I'm doing this program. I'm, you know, I'm working on getting healthy. I want to feel good. Like it's it's the long-term goal that you need to put ahead of, you know, what do I feel like right now? Right.

SPEAKER_01:

Because the reality is I can have whatever I want. I can make whatever I want, right? Right. But it's the what I want to do that I that needs changing.

SPEAKER_02:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

And so now we have to like, you know, re reframe it, or you know, I I guess that's the best way of saying it. Yeah. And we it's not that we don't want to do that anymore. It's we want to get better, right? And if I want to get better, eating that or doing that is going to either keep me where I am or make things worse for me.

SPEAKER_02:

Am I right? Yeah. Exactly. Yep, exactly. And and it was brought to my attention yesterday because actually I was speaking to uh a cohort who was a life coach. And I said, Well, these are the things I'm working on. I need to finish my course on A. I need to do, and I I should be, and she caught me saying it, not as it uh, you know, uh uh applied to food or exercise or something, but you know, this applies to everything, right?

SPEAKER_01:

So yeah, life coaches are still living, right? They're we're not we are not perfection, we are not like we are still learning and still going through all the all the things ourselves, right? So yeah, it's easy for us now. I can, you know, listening to someone else, it's easy to listen for those cues, but yeah, when we're talking, we're not listening for them, right? Right. Like we're not mentally like we're not there.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah. I think that I have those around my food and exercise, but sometimes other things, you know. I have sure even I get to wash the dishes because you know, we got to have a nice dinner, and you know, this is you know, just I don't want to, I'm not going to.

SPEAKER_01:

Like we're allowed to say that, right? Because I mean, let's face it, we're there's things that we do because we feel like we have to do them right now, right? But the real reality is, is like, okay, I'm not saying let your dishes overflow for three days. That's not what I'm saying. But if you really feel tired because you just had a big turkey dinner and you're tired and you'd rather be visiting with you know whoever's sitting at it, that's okay. Like, don't feel the pressure, right? And and that will help you change that mindset of I can or I can't.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. And the other cool thing that when you were speaking, I just thought about was um when we get our our food and our movement and things sort of dialed in, it actually not and not perfect. When I say dialed in, uh never about perfection, I'm always about progress, but you know, doing better, being you know, being a better version of yourself. Um, but what I was just thinking of is when we do get that dialed in, we actually give ourselves more time. So people think it takes time, right? And in the beginning it does because you're making mental and physical changes, but it actually gives us more time because you get more energy. So, you know, how is that not a win, right? Right. So um you, you know, it's something you're doing initially, but you, you know, you get used to it, and then you realize you've got more energy. So you've you've bought yourself time. And the other thing I had a client talking about recently was she had a very stressful job, and she said, you know, wow, after working with you only through half of the you know, the the program, she said, I can't remember when I was when I was stressed, like she became so much more resilient to handle the things. So not only now do you have more time because of your energy, but you're you're able to handle things better, right?

SPEAKER_01:

So you're not feeling the stress. I love that. Who doesn't want that life, right?

SPEAKER_02:

Exactly. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

As we close out this year, Karen, what are some practical ways that you know women in general can reset their health and energy before stepping into the new year?

SPEAKER_02:

So, you know, there are some, there of course are many things, but um one that uh we haven't talked about yet um is our breathing, right? So I just recently um certified as a breathwork facilitator, and I so I do breath work sessions with my clients, um, which are you know longer sessions, but our breathing is so important because especially when we're stressed, we're taking shallow um chest breaths. We need to slow our breath down and extend our our abdomen and really do deep belly breaths, right? So, and and breathe through your nose, right? Try and be aware and when you're not talking or eating, try and keep your mouth closed, right? So many benefits to breathing through our nostrils. So try and slow down your breath. There's lots of different things, box breathing, five, six, seven breathing, alternating nostril breathing, like different things like that, right? But really try and be conscious of your breath. Take a longer exhale if you can. So that that's um that's one thing. Another thing that we we hear about all the time is drinking water, right? So that's we've heard that for years and years, but really trying to drink half of your body weight in ounces of of water. But if you if you really don't drink water now, you know, that's obviously a big goal. So just try and just try and start, right? Um, just have a couple glasses of water a day, or you know, buy a bottle that you like and just keep it with you and try and try and drink more water. I'm also a big fan of electrolytes in the water. Um, and that's like sodium, potassium, and magnesium, so minerals that we, you know, that we need.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, and those have to unfortunately be added to our water because they take them out, right? Most cities, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Um, yeah, and then the other thing I was gonna say the nighttime snacking. So we, you know, we got to really try and and eliminate that. So um, you know, I like intermittent fasting, um, but that's a whole big discussion, right? So um, but one of the biggest things is try to stop eating after dinner, it's huge, right? So um brush your teeth. Um, you know, whatever you can do, because oftentimes we just want to change the flavor in our mouth, right? Um, so brush your teeth. And then if you do feel like having something, uh, one, are you staying up too late? I find that when I stay up later than I usually do, then I'm like, oh, what can I eat? I'm not gonna go to bed hungry, right? So I've I've stayed up too late. Um, but ask yourself, are you really hungry? Right. And if you're not, like you need another activity, right? Try and do do something else, right? And sometimes it's doing something else physical or putting yourself somewhere else, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. Um, I so I have a thing with the the eating after, like I had a hard time, so I didn't consider myself a snacker like after supper. My husband used to, he always liked coffee and sometimes lots of times cookies is coffee. And so I was like, well, I would have just a cup of tea, and I was okay with that. But then I found that you know, every once in a while for about a week or two at a time, I would go and I would have that snack with him. And then I would be like, I'd go to bed feeling so full and just uncomfortable. And I'd be like, why am I doing this? Right. So what I started doing was when I did the dishes after supper, uh, I would shut the lights on and I'm like, kitchen is opposed to it, right? If we want a cup of tea, like, okay, we'll have a cup of coffee or a cup of tea, that's fine. But that's it. If I was if I had a snack, I would actually prepare it, right? And put it aside in the coffee machine so that when we made the coffee and the tea, we'd have you know that snack. And it was usually like one cookie each, right? Not a dish of cookies, right? And so my husband would be like, Well, I want more. Well, yeah, I know you want more, but do you need more? Right. We don't need that, especially at that hour, right? At that 9:30, 10 o'clock, we should be like our body's going into digestion mode. And so the more we put into our body, the harder it's gonna have to work when we're sleeping. And women going through menopause, right? Sleep is affected exactly. Three o'clock in the morning when our liver is doing all the work it's supposed to be doing to clean us out. We're wide awake because the liver's overdoing it, right? The liver's like, oh, you're making my life so difficult.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Yeah, or your blood sugar is, you know.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, like I mean, you know, like that's and that's part of your like, you know, eating, like the eliminating, like getting rid of all that stuff. Because we we want to make our organs work for us, right? Right, not against us. And so I think that's where you know, like the whole brain-gut connection comes in, right? Like we need to think on the same line as you know, our our organs, because I mean, let's face it, they're a part of us, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I love that. So I'm assuming like you talked about your best life reset with me the last time we chatted. And I think all the things that you mentioned are kind of a part of that, like this, the five M's, you know, the the you know, the balance of the food and all that stuff. So I'm I'm I want to know more, unless, of course, you've already kind of discovered discussed most of it.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh no, I can I can certainly talk more about it. But so your best life reset is a 12-week program, and it's um it's a group program. So we have you know other women going through it at the same time. Um and I really love that community because they they gain from each other, right? They hear from me, but they also, you know, gain insight from each other. Um, and so even though it's a group, we I also do one-on-one coaching um with the clients. So then I'm helping them individually. And you know, there really is accountability uh in terms of you know what they're eating, what they're doing, what you know, so that especially in the first couple of weeks, I want to make sure they're on the right path and they've got that success, right? And then throughout, we're you know, we're working on the mindset, and you know, we're gonna be doing these things to um you know to manage your stress better. And yeah, and talking about sleep and how can we get better sleep and what affects our sleep and and all of those things, right?

SPEAKER_01:

So my god, I'm getting so excited. Honestly, I don't, I don't know. I think just the whole idea of you know aligning your values with your behaviors and actually getting it right, right? Like it just sounds to me like you really work with your clients to get them working in a position where they can make you know head and gut work together. Like it's it's exactly like my my insights are getting all like dancing and I just love that because I want I want our listeners to do the best that they can to create that life.

SPEAKER_02:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

I mean, there are too many people walking down the street here like robots, right? I mean, we're all like we all feel like shit, we all feel like you know, they're we're too tired to deal with life, right? And we're missing out, we're missing out on so much, yeah, right. And if we just get it all together and we're not like you're not gonna like you know take all the favorite things away because let's face it, if you really love something, don't give it up. You need that happiness, right? But right, if it's not bringing it up.

SPEAKER_02:

I might show you how to do it a bit differently though, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Right, right, exactly. But I mean the the reality is, I mean, if I really love my pasta, right? I mean, I I love pasta, but I have I have slow, you know, taken taken it out a little bit, right? But that doesn't mean like we have to give it up forever, right? Right, and I think that's what you know the best life reset comes down to, right? From what I'm you know, from the little bit that we're talking here. So I'm like just super excited, and I'm like, I want everyone to come talk with you.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, and and I love it because the first six weeks we do uh a certain way of eating, and then the second six weeks is really bringing some things back in. So it's not it, it's not a diet at all, but it's not a a program where you, you know, you get to a certain point and then you're on your own, right? Like I love the people to stay, uh, you know, it's a it's a lifelong thing, like you know how to do it, but you can jump back in at any time to the group, you know, if you need um, you know, tips or motivation or you just want to speak with the community. And the other thing I wanted to say is that um, you know, it's really about healing your body first, right? And so the whole premise of the program is to get your body into the parasympathetic state of um rest and digest where and where you're relaxed, as opposed to you know, the the sympathetic state, which is fight or flight, right? That stress state that we all know, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Which most of us are living in, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Exactly. And the other thing that's really important when I start working with somebody, I always say, I want you to think about your why, right? Because this is what we'll need to come back to when you start feeling challenged, right? So, you know, and sometimes a woman will come to me and say, Well, I want to lose 20 pounds. Well, That's not really your why. What we got to peel that back further. So, why is that important to you? Because you can buy clothes at 20 pounds higher, right? But it's not that we need to be a smaller number of ourselves. It's like we don't need to be, you know, and you don't need to fit into what you were as a teenager. It's not about that, but it's like if how about you know losing the inflammation so your body feels better? Um, you know, to me, weight is is just a byproduct, right? It's it's getting the the body healthy first. So for somebody, it might be well, I want to be able to run around with my grandkids, or I want to be able to travel the world and and do all the hiking and biking and things that I want, right? So you then then it's important to have that in front of you. That that is what you want, right? Yeah, it's it's different for every woman, what uh you know right, and there's no right answer, right? No, it's like whatever is different to you, yeah, yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

So whatever's motivating you, that's what matters, but it's not just about the number on the scale, no, more to it than that. Yeah, I agree with you there. And I've been I've been thinking that way for years now, right?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, and most of us have, yeah, most women, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Exactly. I love that. So if a listener is feeling stuck, you know, in the same cycle of that stress, fatigue, the self-doubt, where should she begin?

SPEAKER_02:

Um, well, you can certainly follow me on Instagram at Karen Porter Health Coach. Um on my website, which is Karen Porter.ca, I've got a great download, which um is I call it my recipe to um to health and happiness. Um, and it it really gives um you know pointers on things that you can uh you know that you can do to really be feeling better. Um in November, um, I'm gonna be doing a pre-holiday feel fabulous five-day challenge. So that's gonna be the week of November 10th. And so that's a free challenge. I, you know, I love to help women, and I know that the women who come to the challenge really um, you know, really want to want to feel good. So I I love that. I love doing those.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, yeah, I love that. That's awesome. Yeah, so I'm um you're gonna give me all the links to that because we're gonna put that with the show notes and I'm probably gonna join. Um, when it comes to challenges, I don't take them very well, so I'm gonna join, but I can't promise.

SPEAKER_02:

No, when you can, you know, even if you get one of the days, one of the tips, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01:

Like it's your body, yeah. Your mind is gonna connect with something as long as it's something positive, that's what matters. I yeah, I love that. So when you look back at your life now, Karen, what is one thing that you are most proud of yourself for overcoming?

SPEAKER_02:

Well, yeah, it I would say it's the you know, it is the lowest points that I've had, right? Um so the anxiety that turned into depression and I was in my worst possible state, wanting to end my life, which came with so much shame because I had a great life, right? Um, and just overcoming that and being now in a position where I feel awesome and I want to share that with other women.

SPEAKER_01:

I love that. And that's what we do, right? That's what I mean. That's what when we've figured out what works for us, we want it to work for everyone else, right? I love that for you. So, and finally, our last question. As we look forward to 2026 already, what does the beginning of me mean to you personally right now?

SPEAKER_02:

Sorry, what does the beginning of me?

SPEAKER_01:

Like, what is your 2026 look like?

SPEAKER_02:

Right. Um, it you know, it really is refining what um, you know, what feels good for me, refining or redefining my success. Um, you know, there are just so many different parts of that, but you know, like you were talking before, as we age and and things change, um what's important to me now is very different than you know what was important five or 10 years ago, right? So it's really just uh, and this is for everybody, but it's like it's aligning with ourselves, it's aligning with me so that I can be the in the best place possible. And it's not selfish, it is you know, it's important because if you're the best version of you, you can be better for everyone around you, and living out your purpose the best way you can.

SPEAKER_01:

That's yeah, that's totally what I'm getting from you. And I love, I love that. So I'm and I say that because personally, like I'm I'm still like, you know, um navigating the perimenopause. I think, you know, like for the most part, I I'm like feeling better about it because I'm I'm trying to look at it in a positive way, like you said, like if we look at it as you know, it's horrible, because there were, I mean, years ago I was saying it's freaking hell, right? Because I felt so shitty. But now, you know, now that I know like what's going on and how I can manage it, I'm feeling so much better about it. Right. Yeah, and I actually am not bitchy about it, right? Like, I mean, I'm I'm still bitchy, but I'm not bitchy about the menopause, right? Because the fact is we're gonna get we're gonna get there.

SPEAKER_02:

Right.

SPEAKER_01:

Whether we want to or not, we're gonna pass that. And so we need to, I feel like we need to embrace it with with love and positivity, right? Like it's a it's a fact of life, so we gotta do it, right? It's like looking in the mirror and like, oh my god, you know, who is that person? Because the person I wanted to be was 20 years ago, right? But today that's not who I am. So what do we do? Do you know right? We can't, I mean, we can we can go look younger, right? There aren't any women doing it, but the fact is I'm still 50, right? Right still, like I'm still the age that I am, right? And so, you know, this like this conversation has helped me even more realize that you know, just accept who we are for who we and what we are, right?

SPEAKER_02:

And just know, and to add positive to that, just know that you can have an effect on it, right? That you know, we can make changes to make it even more comfortable, right, right, exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

And I guess that's what it comes down to. We don't have to just let it happen, right?

SPEAKER_02:

Exactly, exactly.

SPEAKER_01:

Thank you so much for joining me today. This has been awesome. And I I mean, I know we could talk for another couple hours because there's so much, I know you know a lot of stuff, right? I mean this is there takes research. So thank you so much for joining me and sharing what you know. And I really hope that our listeners reach out to you because I think you have great value to share with them.

SPEAKER_02:

Thank you so much. And thanks for having me.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, absolutely. Thank you for tuning in to Confidence in Bloom. I hope today's conversation reminded you that you're not alone on this journey and that your confidence grows every time you tell that itty bitty shitty committee to hush. If you're ready to take this even deeper, I'd love to invite you to the Bloom Room, a nurturing community where women come together to release self-doubt, reconnect with themselves, and bloom into the truest versions of who they're meant to be. You'll find the link in the show notes, and I can't wait to welcome you inside. Until next time, remember, confidence isn't something you find, it's something that blooms from within.

SPEAKER_00:

Thanks for listening. This show was brought to you by Divas That Care. Connect with us on Facebook, on Instagram, and of course on divas that care.com, where you can subscribe to our newsletter so you don't miss a thing.